Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Moderator: MOD_nyhetsgrupper
-
Gordon P.
Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
-
Thor
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Gordon P. waffled to alt.genealogy :
You don't have to make your findings public for a start, so don't let it
stop you from your research. On another level what those a couple of
generations back did is no refelection on you or your characer. It was
their problem don't take their guilt on board.
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
You don't have to make your findings public for a start, so don't let it
stop you from your research. On another level what those a couple of
generations back did is no refelection on you or your characer. It was
their problem don't take their guilt on board.
-
Huntersglenn
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Why would the actions of someone long gone disgrace your family now? Do
you feel personally responsible for everything your parents have ever
done? Do you feel that your children (if you have any, future children,
if you don't) have to be responsible for everything you've ever done in
your life?
I think that having so-called skeletons in the family closet makes
things a lot more interesting -- and puts a human face on our ancestors.
It's all too easy to fall into the trap of thinking that our ancestors
never did anything wrong (and some of this is from generational
brain-washing, as in -- back in my day, girls didn't have sex with boys
unless they were married, etc.), and being able to document those
ancestors who weren't "perfect" can go a long way to showing that some
things aren't confined to the younger generation(s).
I hope that you reconsider how you feel about this ancestor (and any
others that might not be squeaky clean) and no longer feel scared to
know the truth about someone who was every inch a living, breathing
human being, complete with human flaws.
Cathy
Gordon P. wrote:
you feel personally responsible for everything your parents have ever
done? Do you feel that your children (if you have any, future children,
if you don't) have to be responsible for everything you've ever done in
your life?
I think that having so-called skeletons in the family closet makes
things a lot more interesting -- and puts a human face on our ancestors.
It's all too easy to fall into the trap of thinking that our ancestors
never did anything wrong (and some of this is from generational
brain-washing, as in -- back in my day, girls didn't have sex with boys
unless they were married, etc.), and being able to document those
ancestors who weren't "perfect" can go a long way to showing that some
things aren't confined to the younger generation(s).
I hope that you reconsider how you feel about this ancestor (and any
others that might not be squeaky clean) and no longer feel scared to
know the truth about someone who was every inch a living, breathing
human being, complete with human flaws.
Cathy
Gordon P. wrote:
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
-
Brendan R. Wehrung
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Gordon P. (gordonp92929@hotmail.com) writes:
I have a very distant ancestor who was burned as a witch (or whatever
Alsatians called a male witch) around 1680.
My mother was also disturbed (briefly) to learn that her grandfather had
owned a saloon before she was born.
Everybody has an interesting past, ancestor-wise.
Brendan
--
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
I have a very distant ancestor who was burned as a witch (or whatever
Alsatians called a male witch) around 1680.
My mother was also disturbed (briefly) to learn that her grandfather had
owned a saloon before she was born.
Everybody has an interesting past, ancestor-wise.
Brendan
--
-
Charani
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
On Tue, 15 Feb 2005 00:45:29 -0500, Gordon P. wrote:
closets
) It's nothing to worry about and makes a tree more
interesting.
Don't let the stories put you off. How do you know if it's true or
not unless you trace your family history??
When I started doing my family I had a relative tell me that I
shouldn't trace my family history because I wouldn't like what I
found; but it was only scare tactics. I've not found anything in the
slightest bit out of the ordinary. *He* were the one who were scared
of what I might find but, as I say, there was nothing to find.
Go ahead with your research.
PS It doesn't matter if you post with your real name or not.
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Everyone has skeletons or, more often alleged skeletons, in their
closets
interesting.
Don't let the stories put you off. How do you know if it's true or
not unless you trace your family history??
When I started doing my family I had a relative tell me that I
shouldn't trace my family history because I wouldn't like what I
found; but it was only scare tactics. I've not found anything in the
slightest bit out of the ordinary. *He* were the one who were scared
of what I might find but, as I say, there was nothing to find.
Go ahead with your research.
PS It doesn't matter if you post with your real name or not.
-
James A. Doemer
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"Thor" <thor@valhalla.corn> wrote in message
news:XFgQd.1564$1S4.157294@news.xtra.co.nz...
It might if what they did was to marry their sister/brother. :c)
news:XFgQd.1564$1S4.157294@news.xtra.co.nz...
Gordon P. waffled to alt.genealogy :
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
You don't have to make your findings public for a start, so don't let it
stop you from your research. On another level what those a couple of
generations back did is no refelection on you or your characer.
It might if what they did was to marry their sister/brother. :c)
It was
their problem don't take their guilt on board.
-
Lesley Robertson
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"Charani" <me@privacy.net> wrote in message
news:37e053F595li0U1@individual.net...
ago, disgrace the family today? You didn't do it, you weren't there when it
was done, it is no disgrace to you! Even the siblings and children of
murderers are usually perfectly nice, ordinary people.
To be quite honest, it's often interesting to find people with a criminal
background in a family tree simply because there's more records about them.
A family who lived quietly, paid the rent on time and lived blameless lives
have only left a few BMDs behind, whereas there are frequently descriptions
(and sometimes even photos) of the folk who spent time in jail.
Standards have also shifted - major scandals of yesteryear are no longer
shocking.
Most of these things seem worse because they are unknown. It doesn't matter
whether your reaction if you find anything is "Is that all?" or "Oh that's
terrible"? At least you will know.
Lesley Robertson
news:37e053F595li0U1@individual.net...
On Tue, 15 Feb 2005 00:45:29 -0500, Gordon P. wrote:
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Everyone has skeletons or, more often alleged skeletons, in their
closets) It's nothing to worry about and makes a tree more
interesting.
Don't let the stories put you off. How do you know if it's true or
not unless you trace your family history??
Agrred. And even if it's true, how can things that someone else did, years
ago, disgrace the family today? You didn't do it, you weren't there when it
was done, it is no disgrace to you! Even the siblings and children of
murderers are usually perfectly nice, ordinary people.
To be quite honest, it's often interesting to find people with a criminal
background in a family tree simply because there's more records about them.
A family who lived quietly, paid the rent on time and lived blameless lives
have only left a few BMDs behind, whereas there are frequently descriptions
(and sometimes even photos) of the folk who spent time in jail.
Standards have also shifted - major scandals of yesteryear are no longer
shocking.
Most of these things seem worse because they are unknown. It doesn't matter
whether your reaction if you find anything is "Is that all?" or "Oh that's
terrible"? At least you will know.
Lesley Robertson
-
James A. Doemer
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"Brendan R. Wehrung" <ck183@FreeNet.Carleton.CA> wrote in message
news:cus7pj$2b6$1@theodyn.ncf.ca...
My Grandfather once told me a story about when he was a Deputy Sheriff down
in Kentucky, Logan County I think he said. Anyway, he and another Deputy
ran across a family running a huge still down in "a hollar". There was
only the two of them, and at least 40 men running and around the still, most
of them were armed with anything from squirrel rifles to handguns. My
Grandfather and the deputy went back to town and brought back 10 stickes of
dynomite and sit up on the ridge and started chucking it down on the
moonshiner's, then arrested the 10 or so dazed men that were still standing.
So much for due process of law....
news:cus7pj$2b6$1@theodyn.ncf.ca...
Gordon P. (gordonp92929@hotmail.com) writes:
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
I have a very distant ancestor who was burned as a witch (or whatever
Alsatians called a male witch) around 1680.
My mother was also disturbed (briefly) to learn that her grandfather had
owned a saloon before she was born.
Everybody has an interesting past, ancestor-wise.
Brendan
My Grandfather once told me a story about when he was a Deputy Sheriff down
in Kentucky, Logan County I think he said. Anyway, he and another Deputy
ran across a family running a huge still down in "a hollar". There was
only the two of them, and at least 40 men running and around the still, most
of them were armed with anything from squirrel rifles to handguns. My
Grandfather and the deputy went back to town and brought back 10 stickes of
dynomite and sit up on the ridge and started chucking it down on the
moonshiner's, then arrested the 10 or so dazed men that were still standing.
So much for due process of law....
-
Saffy
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"Lesley Robertson" <l.a.robertson@tnw.tudelft.nl> wrote in message
news:52896$4211e367$82a1f636$28926@news1.tudelft.nl...
A couple of generations is however pretty recent history and anything he
finds out might directly affect his parents and their siblings. I have
deliberately not looked into a branch of my Husbands family as I know it
would distress my MIL if I did.
Saffy
news:52896$4211e367$82a1f636$28926@news1.tudelft.nl...
"Charani" <me@privacy.net> wrote in message
news:37e053F595li0U1@individual.net...
On Tue, 15 Feb 2005 00:45:29 -0500, Gordon P. wrote:
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Everyone has skeletons or, more often alleged skeletons, in their
closets) It's nothing to worry about and makes a tree more
interesting.
Don't let the stories put you off. How do you know if it's true or
not unless you trace your family history??
Agreed. And even if it's true, how can things that someone else did, years
ago, disgrace the family today?
A couple of generations is however pretty recent history and anything he
finds out might directly affect his parents and their siblings. I have
deliberately not looked into a branch of my Husbands family as I know it
would distress my MIL if I did.
Saffy
-
awnospamj@ev1.net
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Don't worry about it. Do the research. Live a little. My mothers family
told me that I should not research my fathers line because they were such
bad people. I have found that the ones I have met, albeit not close
relatives, are fairly normal. The only interesting thing I have found is
when they left Laurel County, Kentucky there was a fire or flood that
destroyed records and when my g grandfather got married in St. Paul, Ar.,
shortly after they moved back to Rogers, Ar. the courthouse in St. Paul
burned.....hmmmmmm. interesting 8^P
A. W.
"Gordon P." <gordonp92929@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:7t2311hrvo01ra4psh3a5tq06tvuc6dv5b@4ax.com...
told me that I should not research my fathers line because they were such
bad people. I have found that the ones I have met, albeit not close
relatives, are fairly normal. The only interesting thing I have found is
when they left Laurel County, Kentucky there was a fire or flood that
destroyed records and when my g grandfather got married in St. Paul, Ar.,
shortly after they moved back to Rogers, Ar. the courthouse in St. Paul
burned.....hmmmmmm. interesting 8^P
A. W.
"Gordon P." <gordonp92929@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:7t2311hrvo01ra4psh3a5tq06tvuc6dv5b@4ax.com...
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
-
mickg
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
James A. Doemer wrote:
Well maybe they were from West Virginia! or European Royalty!!
MickG
"Thor" <thor@valhalla.corn> wrote in message
news:XFgQd.1564$1S4.157294@news.xtra.co.nz...
snip
You don't have to make your findings public for a start, so don't let it
stop you from your research. On another level what those a couple of
generations back did is no refelection on you or your characer.
It might if what they did was to marry their sister/brother. :c)
Well maybe they were from West Virginia! or European Royalty!!
MickG
-
James A. Doemer
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"mickg" <mickgNoSpam@tampabay.rr.com> wrote in message
news:4cmQd.79355$qB6.75919@tornado.tampabay.rr.com...
Hehehe.. Could be.
news:4cmQd.79355$qB6.75919@tornado.tampabay.rr.com...
James A. Doemer wrote:
"Thor" <thor@valhalla.corn> wrote in message
news:XFgQd.1564$1S4.157294@news.xtra.co.nz...
snip
You don't have to make your findings public for a start, so don't let it
stop you from your research. On another level what those a couple of
generations back did is no refelection on you or your characer.
It might if what they did was to marry their sister/brother. :c)
Well maybe they were from West Virginia! or European Royalty!!
MickG
Hehehe.. Could be.
-
singhals
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Gordon P. wrote:
No one who has replied so far seems to have siblings. (g) Could your
cousin be yanking your chain? Either by hyping-up what happened or by
creating it out of whole cloth?
Or, what was considered !SHOCKING! two generations ago hardly raises an
eyebrow these days? Divorce, two generations ago was referred to in
whispers; today the details of acquaintances' divorces are discussed at
the water-cooler.
OTOH, I suppose it's theoretically possible you're kin to one of those
newsmakers who make colorful collaterals but are probably uncomfortable
directs.
Cheryl
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
No one who has replied so far seems to have siblings. (g) Could your
cousin be yanking your chain? Either by hyping-up what happened or by
creating it out of whole cloth?
Or, what was considered !SHOCKING! two generations ago hardly raises an
eyebrow these days? Divorce, two generations ago was referred to in
whispers; today the details of acquaintances' divorces are discussed at
the water-cooler.
OTOH, I suppose it's theoretically possible you're kin to one of those
newsmakers who make colorful collaterals but are probably uncomfortable
directs.
Cheryl
-
GypsyL
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Gordon P. <gordonp92929@hotmail.com> wrote:
Don't be afraid - genealogy is really simply the story of your family.
It's got to include the good, the bad, and the ugly for it to tell the
whole story.
That being said, in the process of discovering some bad stuff about my
gr-grandfather, I learned more about why my grandfather and father
were the way they were. So, I'm glad I found out - understanding my
dad better, even though he's not around anymore, was invaluable to me.
But, instead of announcing this discovery to my family (siblings,
etc.), I have quietly added the information to my records that will be
handed down. I haven't made a big deal about it.
That way, I can preserve the family story for future generations, yet
not dishonor my father, who evidently wanted to keep things secret
from us.
Hope this helps.
GypsyL
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Don't be afraid - genealogy is really simply the story of your family.
It's got to include the good, the bad, and the ugly for it to tell the
whole story.
That being said, in the process of discovering some bad stuff about my
gr-grandfather, I learned more about why my grandfather and father
were the way they were. So, I'm glad I found out - understanding my
dad better, even though he's not around anymore, was invaluable to me.
But, instead of announcing this discovery to my family (siblings,
etc.), I have quietly added the information to my records that will be
handed down. I haven't made a big deal about it.
That way, I can preserve the family story for future generations, yet
not dishonor my father, who evidently wanted to keep things secret
from us.
Hope this helps.
GypsyL
-
Bruce Remick
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"Gordon P." <gordonp92929@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:7t2311hrvo01ra4psh3a5tq06tvuc6dv5b@4ax.com...
Scared? You've got to be kidding. How could you not proceed to dig further
now? Hasn't your curiosity been aroused? Most researchers looking into their
family's past would be excited to uncover something "special", even if it's not
something to brag about. A lot of us who dig back in time often find lots of
relatives who were "laborers" or "farmers" or "clerks". Someone with a bit of
notoriety could add spice to your family story. If you do find that realtive to
be repulsive and embarrassing, at least you've checked it out for yourself and
then can decide whether to share what you found with other family members. Not
knowing often can be as frustrating as finding out.
Bruce
'We're curious. Let us know what you find out. We won't tell.'
news:7t2311hrvo01ra4psh3a5tq06tvuc6dv5b@4ax.com...
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
Scared? You've got to be kidding. How could you not proceed to dig further
now? Hasn't your curiosity been aroused? Most researchers looking into their
family's past would be excited to uncover something "special", even if it's not
something to brag about. A lot of us who dig back in time often find lots of
relatives who were "laborers" or "farmers" or "clerks". Someone with a bit of
notoriety could add spice to your family story. If you do find that realtive to
be repulsive and embarrassing, at least you've checked it out for yourself and
then can decide whether to share what you found with other family members. Not
knowing often can be as frustrating as finding out.
Bruce
'We're curious. Let us know what you find out. We won't tell.'
-
Doug Chadduck
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Brendan R. Wehrung wrote:
Family lore says one of my ancestors was on the other side of that fire
a few years earlier. Quite a distinquished ancestor, in history books
etc, but, those were the days, so to speak.
Gordon P. (gordonp92929@hotmail.com) writes:
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
I have a very distant ancestor who was burned as a witch (or whatever
Alsatians called a male witch) around 1680.
Family lore says one of my ancestors was on the other side of that fire
a few years earlier. Quite a distinquished ancestor, in history books
etc, but, those were the days, so to speak.
My mother was also disturbed (briefly) to learn that her grandfather had
owned a saloon before she was born.
Everybody has an interesting past, ancestor-wise.
Brendan
--
-
CLV3
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Honestly Gordon,
We ALL have skeletons in our closet. If we all let that scare us from
finding out where we came from, then I think genealogy would be a dead
hobby. Look at it this way, for each thing that you find that may cause you
a bit of shame...if you go back far enough, you will find at LEAST one thing
that makes you proud. And besides, remember that these don't tell us
anything about YOUR character.....and if you do find thing that DO make you
proud, try to model yourself after those things.
We ALL have skeletons in our closet. If we all let that scare us from
finding out where we came from, then I think genealogy would be a dead
hobby. Look at it this way, for each thing that you find that may cause you
a bit of shame...if you go back far enough, you will find at LEAST one thing
that makes you proud. And besides, remember that these don't tell us
anything about YOUR character.....and if you do find thing that DO make you
proud, try to model yourself after those things.
-
saki
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"CLV3" <clvoyer3@verizon.net> wrote in
news:S9uQd.58505$g16.10792@trndny08:
I was mainly interested in one grandfather who was generally perceived by
my parents to be (I suppose you could say politely) a bit of an
entrepreneurial con-artist. I'm not finding that to be true, at least
from what information is available. His brother, on the other hand, was a
real charlatan (mortgaged his mother's house without telling her, skipped
out on her funeral so he wouldn't have to pay for it, stole money from
his daughter). By contrast my grandfather was a saint. This was faintly
cheering.
What was nice to find was the unexpected. I've always felt that two of my
own interests (academia and gardening) must have been inherited from
somewhere because no one else in my immediate family pursued anything
like them. Wouldn't you know? I have a religious scholar on one branch
(he earned a doctorate at the University of Utrecht in 1839) and *two*
gardeners, one the head gardener to the Prince of Nassau-Weilburg in
Germany during the early nineteenth century. If I hadn't looked I never
would have found out.
For establishing family medical history, genealogy is also very helpful.
What looked to me like a pattern of early deaths (forties and fifties) in
my family was actually the result of random misfortune among a very few
of my folks. The more I looked the more I discovered that most of them
lived into their eighties. This was a nice benefit to the research.
Don't fret. I think there's more positive to discover than otherwise.
----
saki@ucla.edu
news:S9uQd.58505$g16.10792@trndny08:
Honestly Gordon,
We ALL have skeletons in our closet. If we all let that scare us from
finding out where we came from, then I think genealogy would be a dead
hobby. Look at it this way, for each thing that you find that may
cause you a bit of shame...if you go back far enough, you will find at
LEAST one thing that makes you proud. And besides, remember that these
don't tell us anything about YOUR character.....and if you do find
thing that DO make you proud, try to model yourself after those
things.
I was mainly interested in one grandfather who was generally perceived by
my parents to be (I suppose you could say politely) a bit of an
entrepreneurial con-artist. I'm not finding that to be true, at least
from what information is available. His brother, on the other hand, was a
real charlatan (mortgaged his mother's house without telling her, skipped
out on her funeral so he wouldn't have to pay for it, stole money from
his daughter). By contrast my grandfather was a saint. This was faintly
cheering.
What was nice to find was the unexpected. I've always felt that two of my
own interests (academia and gardening) must have been inherited from
somewhere because no one else in my immediate family pursued anything
like them. Wouldn't you know? I have a religious scholar on one branch
(he earned a doctorate at the University of Utrecht in 1839) and *two*
gardeners, one the head gardener to the Prince of Nassau-Weilburg in
Germany during the early nineteenth century. If I hadn't looked I never
would have found out.
For establishing family medical history, genealogy is also very helpful.
What looked to me like a pattern of early deaths (forties and fifties) in
my family was actually the result of random misfortune among a very few
of my folks. The more I looked the more I discovered that most of them
lived into their eighties. This was a nice benefit to the research.
Don't fret. I think there's more positive to discover than otherwise.
----
saki@ucla.edu
-
John A Rea
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
mickg wrote:
Or ancient Egyptians
James A. Doemer wrote:
"Thor" <thor@valhalla.corn> wrote in message
news:XFgQd.1564$1S4.157294@news.xtra.co.nz...
snip
You don't have to make your findings public for a start, so don't let it
stop you from your research. On another level what those a couple of
generations back did is no refelection on you or your characer.
It might if what they did was to marry their sister/brother. :c)
Well maybe they were from West Virginia! or European Royalty!!
MickG
\
Or ancient Egyptians
-
John A Rea
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Charani wrote:
That's all very easy for you all to say, without offering any details,
but consider: one of my ancestors is acknowledged to have been a poet!
On Tue, 15 Feb 2005 00:45:29 -0500, Gordon P. wrote:
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Everyone has skeletons or, more often alleged skeletons, in their
closets) It's nothing to worry about and makes a tree more
interesting.
Don't let the stories put you off. How do you know if it's true or
not unless you trace your family history??
When I started doing my family I had a relative tell me that I
shouldn't trace my family history because I wouldn't like what I
found; but it was only scare tactics. I've not found anything in the
slightest bit out of the ordinary. *He* were the one who were scared
of what I might find but, as I say, there was nothing to find.
Go ahead with your research.
PS It doesn't matter if you post with your real name or not.
That's all very easy for you all to say, without offering any details,
but consider: one of my ancestors is acknowledged to have been a poet!
-
Bruce Remick
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"John A Rea" <j.rea2@insightbb.com> wrote in message
news:4212A537.7020309@insightbb.com...
And you didn't noet?
Bruce
news:4212A537.7020309@insightbb.com...
Charani wrote:
On Tue, 15 Feb 2005 00:45:29 -0500, Gordon P. wrote:
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Everyone has skeletons or, more often alleged skeletons, in their
closets) It's nothing to worry about and makes a tree more
interesting.
Don't let the stories put you off. How do you know if it's true or
not unless you trace your family history??
When I started doing my family I had a relative tell me that I
shouldn't trace my family history because I wouldn't like what I
found; but it was only scare tactics. I've not found anything in the
slightest bit out of the ordinary. *He* were the one who were scared
of what I might find but, as I say, there was nothing to find.
Go ahead with your research.
PS It doesn't matter if you post with your real name or not.
That's all very easy for you all to say, without offering any details,
but consider: one of my ancestors is acknowledged to have been a poet!
And you didn't noet?
Bruce
-
Nonnus
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"Gordon P." <gordonp92929@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:7t2311hrvo01ra4psh3a5tq06tvuc6dv5b@4ax.com...
Stepping up on my SOAP BOX:
Our genes make us WHAT we are not WHO we are. We decide. John Wilkes Booth
had children, but have they shot anymore presidents? I have a g-granddad
that remarried after his wife died then 2 yrs later placed his 3 kids in an
orphanage. A g-uncle whose wife left him - by his tell, only to find many
years later, after his death - her blood stained dress was in his office
desk drawer all those years and then many years later the bones of a woman
were found buried in the basement of their home. On the other hand I have
an g-g-grand uncle that was the owner of the first printing press in Denver
Colorado, and the first news paper for Denver came off his press.
You have to look at the times when things happened too. In the
revolutionary war I had relatives on both sides of the fighting. The same
in the civil war. The American frontier, the expansion west, the Native
American displacement, the gold rush, the depression. We are all people of
our times, and our choices in those times. Some rose to greatness, some
fell, some simply maintained. Some had it easy, some had it hard. While my
grandparents may have been "embarrassed" about some of the goings-on of
their parents and grandparents, we certainly live in a time where we don't
measure our worth or abilities by our relatives, or certainly not of our
grand and g-grand relatives.
I say look and see. A wise man once said that "if we don't learn from the
mistakes of the past, we are doomed to repeat them." The past is too
important to let it fade away. When we know where we came from, it will be
easier to decide where we are going.
Stepping down from my SOAP BOX
Any opinions stated above are solely my own and are not the opinion of the
internet provider from which they were sent, or any server on which they may
reside. Any one disagreeing with any of the above statements are perfectly
welcome to your opinion and I will die to defend your, and my, right to it.
However, I will refuse to argue with you in this form as flaming each other
is considered in my opinion to be off topic.
Nonnus
news:7t2311hrvo01ra4psh3a5tq06tvuc6dv5b@4ax.com...
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
Stepping up on my SOAP BOX:
Our genes make us WHAT we are not WHO we are. We decide. John Wilkes Booth
had children, but have they shot anymore presidents? I have a g-granddad
that remarried after his wife died then 2 yrs later placed his 3 kids in an
orphanage. A g-uncle whose wife left him - by his tell, only to find many
years later, after his death - her blood stained dress was in his office
desk drawer all those years and then many years later the bones of a woman
were found buried in the basement of their home. On the other hand I have
an g-g-grand uncle that was the owner of the first printing press in Denver
Colorado, and the first news paper for Denver came off his press.
You have to look at the times when things happened too. In the
revolutionary war I had relatives on both sides of the fighting. The same
in the civil war. The American frontier, the expansion west, the Native
American displacement, the gold rush, the depression. We are all people of
our times, and our choices in those times. Some rose to greatness, some
fell, some simply maintained. Some had it easy, some had it hard. While my
grandparents may have been "embarrassed" about some of the goings-on of
their parents and grandparents, we certainly live in a time where we don't
measure our worth or abilities by our relatives, or certainly not of our
grand and g-grand relatives.
I say look and see. A wise man once said that "if we don't learn from the
mistakes of the past, we are doomed to repeat them." The past is too
important to let it fade away. When we know where we came from, it will be
easier to decide where we are going.
Stepping down from my SOAP BOX
Any opinions stated above are solely my own and are not the opinion of the
internet provider from which they were sent, or any server on which they may
reside. Any one disagreeing with any of the above statements are perfectly
welcome to your opinion and I will die to defend your, and my, right to it.
However, I will refuse to argue with you in this form as flaming each other
is considered in my opinion to be off topic.
Nonnus
-
dps
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Jack Lee argues (using statistical methods) that virtually everyone of
European descent is descended from Charlemagne
(http://www.oz.net/~lee/Genealogy/charlemagne.html).
The point here is that since human nature hasn't changed that much in a
mere 12 centuries, there were just as many despicable characters back
then (and prior to that) as there are now. And (assuming you're of
European descent), you are descended from all of them (at least the ones
who had children). Me too.
European descent is descended from Charlemagne
(http://www.oz.net/~lee/Genealogy/charlemagne.html).
The point here is that since human nature hasn't changed that much in a
mere 12 centuries, there were just as many despicable characters back
then (and prior to that) as there are now. And (assuming you're of
European descent), you are descended from all of them (at least the ones
who had children). Me too.
-
f/fgeorge
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"Gordon P." <gordonp92929@hotmail.com> wrote in message
mean if Jesse James, John Dillinger, or whoever was in my lineage it
would add an interesting twist to the research. We find out about kids
born before the marriage has lasted 9 moinths and we think that is
"astonishing"! Life is life, it happened in the past and that makes it
History, INTERESTING History, but History none the less.
I am related thru several marriages to Gary Condit the former
Congressman of California. He is not even AWARE I am live, but he is
in my tree. Should I be ashamed of what he could have done, no I am
not!!! HE could be, but I am not. He made his life and I made mine,
they both have their twists and turns.
news:7t2311hrvo01ra4psh3a5tq06tvuc6dv5b@4ax.com...
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
Find out, often things are NOT as bad as others percieve them to be! I
mean if Jesse James, John Dillinger, or whoever was in my lineage it
would add an interesting twist to the research. We find out about kids
born before the marriage has lasted 9 moinths and we think that is
"astonishing"! Life is life, it happened in the past and that makes it
History, INTERESTING History, but History none the less.
I am related thru several marriages to Gary Condit the former
Congressman of California. He is not even AWARE I am live, but he is
in my tree. Should I be ashamed of what he could have done, no I am
not!!! HE could be, but I am not. He made his life and I made mine,
they both have their twists and turns.
-
Dave Hinz
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
On Tue, 15 Feb 2005 21:07:04 -0500, Bruce Remick <remick@cox.net> wrote:
His genes shoet.
"John A Rea" <j.rea2@insightbb.com> wrote in message
news:4212A537.7020309@insightbb.com...
Charani wrote:
That's all very easy for you all to say, without offering any details,
but consider: one of my ancestors is acknowledged to have been a poet!
And you didn't noet?
His genes shoet.
-
John Hill
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
f/fgeorge <ffgeorge@yourplace.com> wrote:
In 19th century England and earlier, it was almost the norm. It did at
least make sure the couple could breed
--
Reply to john at yclept dot freeserve dot co dot uk
We find out about kids born before the marriage has lasted 9 moinths and
we think that is "astonishing"!
In 19th century England and earlier, it was almost the norm. It did at
least make sure the couple could breed
--
Reply to john at yclept dot freeserve dot co dot uk
-
Donna
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
We find out about kids born before the marriage has lasted 9 moinths and
we think that is "astonishing"!
John wrote:
In 19th century England and earlier, it was almost the norm.
_________________-
Correct! An engagement was quite binding, and historians report that
physical relations were customary for many respectable engaged couples. It
is estimated that almost 50% of Puritan American brides were pregnant.
And to the topic of "scared of who I might be related to"::::::::
I didn't enter into family research with expectations of finding important
people. I am not interested in being related to royalty, etc. If I found
that I am related to a George Washington or an Einstein, that would only
mean that our blood line had certainly declined!
I have found a few very accomplished and even well known people (during
their time). However, I have also found some things I would just rather not
have known. They were not particularly bad circumstances, they were just so
tragic that they make my heart sink each time I think about them.
I have found a possible illegitimacy and a possible forbidden
dilly-dallying. And there is another thing I've found that I'm sure could
be explained if only I could resurrect him to have him explain his side.
If my life were put into a database with every "event" logged, it might look
a little shabby in spots. So I hope my descendants will be kind.
Donna
-
Melissa Warner
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
A couple of generations is however pretty recent history and anything he
finds out might directly affect his parents and their siblings. I have
deliberately not looked into a branch of my Husbands family as I know it
would distress my MIL if I did.
Saffy
It should be pointed out here that you don't have to tell everyone what you
find about every person you are researching. You may one day decided to post
what you find on the internet, or write a book or journal article, or
whatever, and at that point you will have to decide what will be public
information, and what is private. Until then, research whatever you want,
and just keep it to yourself if you feel the information will be too hard
for someone to hear.
Melissa
-
Jane
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Bruce Remick wrote:
I have to agree.
Most of my ancestors were farmers and tradesmen. Their main claim to fame
seems to have been starting churches (I've found four so far). I guess they
didn't like to travel too far to worship!
But this is pretty dull stuff.
I've also come across one ancestor whose land was confiscated by the Crown,
around the time when he left the country. They refused to return it to his
children, so I imagine he must have done something the officials of the day
thought of as bad, to cause such retribution. Frankly, I'm dying to know
what it was! Perhaps there is a colourful story to add to my family tree.
Jane
"Gordon P." <gordonp92929@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:7t2311hrvo01ra4psh3a5tq06tvuc6dv5b@4ax.com...
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank
you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
Scared? You've got to be kidding. How could you not proceed to dig
further now? Hasn't your curiosity been aroused? Most researchers
looking into their family's past would be excited to uncover
something "special", even if it's not something to brag about. A lot
of us who dig back in time often find lots of relatives who were
"laborers" or "farmers" or "clerks". Someone with a bit of notoriety
could add spice to your family story. If you do find that realtive
to be repulsive and embarrassing, at least you've checked it out for
yourself and then can decide whether to share what you found with
other family members. Not knowing often can be as frustrating as
finding out.
Bruce
'We're curious. Let us know what you find out. We won't tell.'
I have to agree.
Most of my ancestors were farmers and tradesmen. Their main claim to fame
seems to have been starting churches (I've found four so far). I guess they
didn't like to travel too far to worship!
But this is pretty dull stuff.
I've also come across one ancestor whose land was confiscated by the Crown,
around the time when he left the country. They refused to return it to his
children, so I imagine he must have done something the officials of the day
thought of as bad, to cause such retribution. Frankly, I'm dying to know
what it was! Perhaps there is a colourful story to add to my family tree.
Jane
-
JennyC
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"Thor" <thor@valhalla.corn> wrote in message
news:XFgQd.1564$1S4.157294@news.xtra.co.nz...
Well imagine if it were someone like Hitler !!!!
Jenny
news:XFgQd.1564$1S4.157294@news.xtra.co.nz...
Gordon P. waffled to alt.genealogy :
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
You don't have to make your findings public for a start, so don't let it
stop you from your research. On another level what those a couple of
generations back did is no refelection on you or your characer. It was
their problem don't take their guilt on board.
Well imagine if it were someone like Hitler !!!!
Jenny
-
Bluegene
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Well, if it had been, I feel certain the world would have known it and
there would be no need to "dig up" the old family! There was an old
saying that if you wanted your family tree researched very quickly, go
into politics!
Also, even if it WAS Hitler, it would not be the fault of his
descendants.
Oops! Hitler mentioned. Thread ended!
Henry F. Brownlee
Hunting Forebears
"JennyC" <JennyC@chello.nl> wrote in message
news:37lem9F5fa9dhU1@individual.net...
there would be no need to "dig up" the old family! There was an old
saying that if you wanted your family tree researched very quickly, go
into politics!
Also, even if it WAS Hitler, it would not be the fault of his
descendants.
Oops! Hitler mentioned. Thread ended!
Henry F. Brownlee
Hunting Forebears
"JennyC" <JennyC@chello.nl> wrote in message
news:37lem9F5fa9dhU1@individual.net...
Well imagine if it were someone like Hitler !!!!
Jenny
-
Dave Hinz
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
On Fri, 18 Feb 2005 21:48:35 -0600, Bluegene <hfbrownl@bellsouth.net> wrote:
Nope, that only works if you're arguing with someone, and compare
them _to_ Hitler. Godwin's Law - and it can't be invoked on purpose
just to bail out of an argument either. It's complicated.
New handle, I see?
Dave
Well, if it had been, I feel certain the world would have known it and
there would be no need to "dig up" the old family! There was an old
saying that if you wanted your family tree researched very quickly, go
into politics!
Also, even if it WAS Hitler, it would not be the fault of his
descendants.
Oops! Hitler mentioned. Thread ended!
Nope, that only works if you're arguing with someone, and compare
them _to_ Hitler. Godwin's Law - and it can't be invoked on purpose
just to bail out of an argument either. It's complicated.
New handle, I see?
Dave
-
Bluegene
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
Yeah, now I remember. Guess we oldsters have to have our memories
jogged on occasion!
Have used the Bluegene handle for a while - seemed like a good one for
Genealogy.
Henry F. Brownlee
Hunting Forebears
"Dave Hinz" <DaveHinz@spamcop.net> wrote in message
news:37ntqhF5bv93mU2@individual.net...
jogged on occasion!
Have used the Bluegene handle for a while - seemed like a good one for
Genealogy.
Henry F. Brownlee
Hunting Forebears
"Dave Hinz" <DaveHinz@spamcop.net> wrote in message
news:37ntqhF5bv93mU2@individual.net...
On Fri, 18 Feb 2005 21:48:35 -0600, Bluegene
hfbrownl@bellsouth.net> wrote:
Well, if it had been, I feel certain the world would have known it
and
there would be no need to "dig up" the old family! There was an
old
saying that if you wanted your family tree researched very
quickly, go
into politics!
Also, even if it WAS Hitler, it would not be the fault of his
descendants.
Oops! Hitler mentioned. Thread ended!
Nope, that only works if you're arguing with someone, and compare
them _to_ Hitler. Godwin's Law - and it can't be invoked on purpose
just to bail out of an argument either. It's complicated.
New handle, I see?
Dave
-
Christopher Jahn
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"Saffy" <fourweekids@hotmail.com> wrote in
news:37e7eqF58mj48U1@individual.net:
And sometimes it works the other way.
My aunt found a clipping in my gggrandmother's diary that seemed to
indicate an ancestor or relative was a murderer. It was an article about
someone with the her surname who had been murdered by his own nephews at
the behest of his own sister in the 1920's!
My grandmother, while alive, would mutter about "family secrets" and
"things are better left alone".
I traced back their family, and discovered that while their family
originated from the same area as ours, I could not establish a direct
link between their line and ours. So they may be distant cousins, but a
common ancestor is back further than 5 generations.
Grandma might have been reassured that that was not one of "our"
skeletons.
--
}:-) Christopher Jahn
{:-( http://home.comcast.net/~xjahn/Main.html
Sinister Dexter has a broken spirometer.
news:37e7eqF58mj48U1@individual.net:
"Lesley Robertson" <l.a.robertson@tnw.tudelft.nl> wrote in message
news:52896$4211e367$82a1f636$28926@news1.tudelft.nl...
"Charani" <me@privacy.net> wrote in message
news:37e053F595li0U1@individual.net...
On Tue, 15 Feb 2005 00:45:29 -0500, Gordon P. wrote:
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank
you-
Everyone has skeletons or, more often alleged skeletons, in their
closets) It's nothing to worry about and makes a tree more
interesting.
Don't let the stories put you off. How do you know if it's true or
not unless you trace your family history??
Agreed. And even if it's true, how can things that someone else did,
years ago, disgrace the family today?
A couple of generations is however pretty recent history and anything
he finds out might directly affect his parents and their siblings. I
have deliberately not looked into a branch of my Husbands family as I
know it would distress my MIL if I did.
And sometimes it works the other way.
My aunt found a clipping in my gggrandmother's diary that seemed to
indicate an ancestor or relative was a murderer. It was an article about
someone with the her surname who had been murdered by his own nephews at
the behest of his own sister in the 1920's!
My grandmother, while alive, would mutter about "family secrets" and
"things are better left alone".
I traced back their family, and discovered that while their family
originated from the same area as ours, I could not establish a direct
link between their line and ours. So they may be distant cousins, but a
common ancestor is back further than 5 generations.
Grandma might have been reassured that that was not one of "our"
skeletons.
--
}:-) Christopher Jahn
{:-( http://home.comcast.net/~xjahn/Main.html
Sinister Dexter has a broken spirometer.
-
Christopher Jahn
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
John A Rea <j.rea2@insightbb.com> wrote in news:4212A537.7020309
@insightbb.com:
You poor bastard!

--
}:-) Christopher Jahn
{:-( http://home.comcast.net/~xjahn/Main.html
Being natural is simply a pose.
@insightbb.com:
Charani wrote:
On Tue, 15 Feb 2005 00:45:29 -0500, Gordon P. wrote:
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank you-
Everyone has skeletons or, more often alleged skeletons, in their
closets) It's nothing to worry about and makes a tree more
interesting.
Don't let the stories put you off. How do you know if it's true or
not unless you trace your family history??
When I started doing my family I had a relative tell me that I
shouldn't trace my family history because I wouldn't like what I
found; but it was only scare tactics. I've not found anything in the
slightest bit out of the ordinary. *He* were the one who were scared
of what I might find but, as I say, there was nothing to find.
Go ahead with your research.
PS It doesn't matter if you post with your real name or not.
That's all very easy for you all to say, without offering any details,
but consider: one of my ancestors is acknowledged to have been a poet!
You poor bastard!
--
}:-) Christopher Jahn
{:-( http://home.comcast.net/~xjahn/Main.html
Being natural is simply a pose.
-
Christopher Jahn
Re: Scared Of Who I Might Be Related To
"Bruce Remick" <remick@cox.net> wrote in
news:FfoQd.34136$Vg3.8225@lakeread05:
My grandmother is rather crushed to discover that her father's line were
dirt poor illiterate tennant farmers and not wealthy horse breeders, as
her father had hinted.
OTOH, this son of an illiterate laborer went on to marry into one of
Southern New Jersey's wealthier farmer family. His real story is at least
as interesting as the one he made up.
I've overturned a lot of family legends. But I have also discovered
compelling stories that are true.
--
}:-) Christopher Jahn
{:-( http://home.comcast.net/~xjahn/Main.html
Being natural is simply a pose.
news:FfoQd.34136$Vg3.8225@lakeread05:
"Gordon P." <gordonp92929@hotmail.com> wrote in message
news:7t2311hrvo01ra4psh3a5tq06tvuc6dv5b@4ax.com...
Hey all -
My cousin (whose side of the family I've never really gotten along
with) told me that his dad (my uncle) was saying that there were some
serious skeletons in our family closet, including a whopper of a
relative two generations old. Someone that would disgrace the family
mightily - famous name, bad reputation, etc.
I am so scared of finding more out about this - has anyone else been
in this situation? How do you deal with it - is it better to know the
truth, or do you wish you never found out?
Advice would be much appreciated before I possibly proceed. Thank
you-
Gordon P (not my real name)
Scared? You've got to be kidding. How could you not proceed to dig
further now? Hasn't your curiosity been aroused? Most researchers
looking into their family's past would be excited to uncover something
"special", even if it's not something to brag about. A lot of us who
dig back in time often find lots of relatives who were "laborers" or
"farmers" or "clerks".
My grandmother is rather crushed to discover that her father's line were
dirt poor illiterate tennant farmers and not wealthy horse breeders, as
her father had hinted.
OTOH, this son of an illiterate laborer went on to marry into one of
Southern New Jersey's wealthier farmer family. His real story is at least
as interesting as the one he made up.
I've overturned a lot of family legends. But I have also discovered
compelling stories that are true.
--
}:-) Christopher Jahn
{:-( http://home.comcast.net/~xjahn/Main.html
Being natural is simply a pose.